Just before christmas I had to go to the V.E.T. for a blood test. Now this is bad enough, but this time they took EXTRA blood. I felt a bit faint. But the DogFather said he could not carry me to the car so I would just have to stagger.
I had to walk past ALL the other dogs waiting looking like this:
Oh the shame....
I'm just going to lie here for the whole of the holidays to get over it
Merry christmas everyone..
Have you any idea how long it took me to finish doing the dishes?
I was that tired I had to go lie down and have a nap.
Mind you, if there are any more that need doing, just let me know ok?
My PLN WORKED
My daddy is home....
Have you ever seen a dog do donuts of joy?
I am a happy bunny, I mean person, er thing, er DOG!
So far all my cunnning plns to keep the DogFather home have failed, however, I have a NEW PLN.
I have heard it said that dreams can come true (that's what they say in all those Hollywood movies, and I should know, dad watches enough of them!) so I am going to lie down:
And DREAM the DogFather home..
Do you think it will work?
There I was, fast asleep on my sofa, dreaming of sausages and catching up on my beauty sleep, when she who must be obeyed WOKE me UP.
(as you can see... I need my beauty sleep and am not at my best when just woken, but then, who is?)
And then she drags me out for a walk. Just cos she is home with a headache and needs fresh air. She does not need to inflict it on ME.
Mind you, this grass smells yummy.... wonder who has "been" here...
Mum, if we head of this way we will get back to the sausages quicker. Did you know that?
Well thanks mum, it was very kind of you to fetch me such a large supply of sticks. But while I'm partial to the odd bit of bark to chew on, I'd really rather these were bones.
Any chance?
Exactly HOW many beds does one lurcher need????
I don't suppose you could leave any for the rest of us?
BEDHOG!
Oh well - I suppose I will just have to slum it on the sofa.
Humph.....
Oy - I want a word with you!!!
Could you PLEASE come home, AlphaB keeps taking us out in the dark, and wind, and rain
And I'm not very impressed.
Did I mention it was muddy? and dark? and wet? AND windy?
Well - DID YOU?
I think I did...
Yup, I definitely did
yeah, me too, pesky deerhound
We'd NEVER be allowed to get away with this:
I don't BELIEVE IT.
No No... You can't go....
No way, uhuh.
Damn. Looking pitiful did not work, the DogFather has gone away and left me for a WHOLE 2 weeks. That's forever in wolfie years. I can see I am going to have to come up with a new PLN.
Five years ago today I first came to this house. I thought it would "do" so decided to stick around and honour the denizens with my presence. Apparently AlphaB let me stay because she thought I "would not last long". SUCKER!
Aren't they lucky?
In celebration of this auspicious event I think I need a few more treats, I wonder if they will bring me salmon for breakfast?
Hang on a sec... do I spy food?
Hmm... looks suspiciously like food to me....
It IS FOOD. WAIT FOR ME.
Yes that bit will do nicely.
Leave the plates, I will clean up...
Right then - what's for my gotcha day dinner? Steak? A date with Finnegan?
I have the answer, I've worked out were those silly humans are going wrong and why they are not as happy as lurchers.
I really have.
It all goes wrong at the start of the day, it's called "Getting up".
Silly humans.
No doubt you've all noticed that there has been a serious deficit of lurchery sprinting photos of late. Well there is a reason for that. It's dark when we go out. And no matter HOW much we run about, our rubbish humans fail to catch us on camera.
Defective, I say.
To make up for this I decided to help out the humans with a bit of "in the house" action:
I CAN catch!
Hey - three for three - how good is that?
Other denizens of Tigh Gadhar are not quite sure what to do with this kind of action:
But I'm reliably informed if the toy is thrown directly into the gaping maw QB calls a mouth, he can manage to close it in time and not bite his tongue:
Me? I'm not convinced.
There is ANOTHER dog in the house....
His name is Marlowe and he is definitively NOT an SUMD:
He's been to visit before, but has always gone home, THIS time he brought his OWN bed which he put in the middle of OUR living room, which does not bode well. The cheek:
Apparently the girls think he is quite handsome, but I don't see it myself. And what's more... is he DROOOOOOOOLS:
Yeeeurch!
I'm a good boy I am, I don't do that.
I think I'll just lie on the sofa and sulk till he goes.
There's no Smoked Salmon?
Oh well... I suppose I will have to slum it with sausages then...
What IS the world coming to?
I've been a little under the weather of late, so those suckers humans have been spoiling me, don't tell the others
Ooops... I've been spotted... does this mean I have to share?
